Monday, January 19, 2009

We're just ordinary people...we don't know which way to go...


My life can be pretty boring. My days are pretty routine. Wakeup, shower, work, lunch, work, home, dinner, television, sleep, repeat.

Occasionally the gym will be thrown in there. Or beer. Or Trivia. Friends. Family. Still pretty routine.

Perfectly ordinary. And that…is….great!

The alternative? Beyond ordinary. Or rather “Beyond Ordinary.” Still not understanding?

How about:

OnDemand => TV Entertainment => Discovery Networks=>TLC => Beyond Ordinary

You know who you’ll find there? The Man Whose Arms Exploded.

Gregg Valentino. 28 inch biceps. It looked like he had tennis balls in his arms. I bet if his arms had a commercial, they could bring back Ellio's kid and have him go "blub blub blub" because that's what I am reminded of by his arms. Blub, blub, blub.

You may also meet his friend, Octopus Man. Or Ukrainian tall drink of water, Leonid Stadnyk. He’s checking out the scene at a towering 8 feet 4 inches. Or “Incredibly Small” Kenadie Jourdin, a two year old who weighs 8 lbs and is 24 inches long.

I don’t even know what they would title my “Beyond Ordinary” documentary.

“The Girl Who Likes Hot Dogs Too Much”
“The Girl That Overquotes the Simpsons”
“The Girl That Can’t Stop Giggling”

Sounds pretty lame. Awesomely lame. Awesomely ordinary. And that's just fine with me.

3 comments:

@jaykeith said...

I would think, based on the previous 3-4 photos I've seen of you, the title should be something like, "The girl whose jaw was unhinged."

But I like the other ones you suggested too, though I didn't know you liked hot dogs.....weird.

Anonymous said...

Seen the tree man or the lady with huge legs? Don't remember the names of those ones, but they've been on there.

My favorite title for one of those was "The Boy Whose Skin Fell Off."

Lisa Lisa said...

I have one saved on my DVR entitled "My Skin Could Kill Me" but I haven't been able to watch the whole thing yet without having to shut it off.

Those girls have it way worse than "The Girl Who Sometimes Wears Her Hair Straight Even Though It Is Curly."